The day after two drug full days: 2:25 AM I am up like a clockwork last few nights.  

I can choose to be resentful and frustrated. I choose to embrace it. I’m in our comfortable bed and not feeling too queasy. I am grateful for that. I will make friends with you, the waking one.

Time is a funny thing. Perception is everything. Time in our head can be so abundant or so scarce. I noted that cancer does one thing very well – it focuses you on what truly matters and I find that time is just perfect. Not too much, not too little: 

Having loved, 

Having been loved,  

Having touched people’s hearts,  

Having been touched by people,  

People mattered to me, 

I mattered to them,  

Without death,  

Life isn’t precious.  

Not that I lived my life regrettably never 

But I did my best under the circumstance.  

I was given many blessings  

Along with some significant deficiencies including arrogance 

I knew and believed only so much then to make the decisions that I made,  

Just like I know only so much now to think what I think,  

So there, it wasn’t a perfect life that I lived, but also had no big regrets,  

I am okay with all the learning that I received from those mistakes. 

I wonder if I will be of service to the world if I live on. Do I have the stuff to give to make a positive impact on this world?  

I say, “Yes!”  

So I soldier on, shaken or not.

Previous Post

Two in a Boat

Next Post

I Will Rally But Not Today

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to top